They Call Me Cookie to My Face

  I will begin by honestly admitting that I have NEVER TAKEN a psychology course.  My opinions and viewpoints are based upon independent study alone.  That having been said...I have officially begun to prove my point. We all know that Diddy is in trouble. He has asked for bail 3 times and the court has denied him.  We all saw the tapes, we heard the rumors before his house got raided. As his victims begin to step forward I am noticing a pattern of skepticism. "Why are they saying something now? Why didn't they report it back then." "They are just in it for the money grab." That may very well be true for some of the accusers, but as for the others... I wonder... You don't need a psychology degree to know that if you tell a therapist you were raped by a celebrity they will most likely question the fuck out of you.  They will begin the process of checking for delusional traits.  Imagine if you are a victim that was drugged and manipulated.  What evidence ...

  Kamala Harris lost the election to Donald Trump. I am not afraid. All my bills are paid. I'm not broke. I've been remade.  My laughter is an affront. To dragons sitting on treasure.  They can't burn me.  And when they fly away I won't take what is theirs.  I just feel...different.  Not like "fuck it" or "duck it" or "fuck this" I just couldn't care less about what is woven into a rug... …that I'm not standing on. 

  The way I feel is no big deal I should have let go long time ago I have no right to brag I have no right to boast That is why I can't post The joy is so bright my eyes squint in the shade I can't believe the progress I have made And all the while  He was telling me the most I didn't listen before That is why I can't post I don't want praise or clout or my name in people's mouths The less they know The more I grow But I had to let it out I can't wait to see what more silence will bring how darkness will lift into a bubbling spring A hidden oasis in the midst of a drought Nothing can stress me unless the enemy finds out And that is why no matter how much I want to share no matter how much my loved ones care I can't post this shit on facebook

 I know I'm wrong.  Calling someone a hood rat is disrespectful, borderline racist (depending on who is using it and context), and just ratchet.  But some bitches out here exhibit the type of behavior that warrants no other mot juste. I have had 2 separate seemingly unrelated women try this shit on me within 6 months.  The first one was a mother of 4 children. Her baby's father (of the 3 smallest) is an alcoholic and, according to her, abusive.  This woman has ghosted me more than once. I should have taken the hint and just left her alone.  After lending her money (which she paid back) and calling the police on her drunk ass baby daddy at her request,  she proceeded to admonish me for my "negative energy." I texted her on the day of her planned birth of the 3rd child of this fool and asked if the "demon" was still at the house. She had previously told me that she didn't want this man at the birth of his own child.  I got a nasty text about negativ...

  I've never really been a big complainer. I wasn't the bossy kid as a habit.  I guess that is why when I finally started speaking up I was perceived as having an attitude.  And to top it off, I'm not the vision of what society views as a woman who is worthy of her demands.  I am dark skinned with coily hair. I don't have a bodacious figure. I'm not a socialite.  I feel as though the response I get for demanding respect and enforcing my boundaries is:  "Who does she think she is?" It is a sad reality that more universally or conformingly attractive women are seen as worthy of what they want.  Seems like if you are not handing out erections you have no right to be respected. And woe unto the woman who refuses to conform and has the nerve to be independent. WE MUST BURN HERRRRR! I'm not hear to whine. I just wanted to get something off my chest.  I have been suffering in silence about these sorts of things. I have to fight for the most basic forms o...

  I just finished the K drama series "Possessed." I thought the series was amazing.  Of course, because I am late to these things I wanted to read the reviews.  There were so many negative takes on the series ending.  One criticism in particular stood out to me as a indication of how much research they did for this show.  Those that commented on the continuity of the spirits that visited the character Pil-Sung. The critic pointed out they seemed to "disappear" for a few episodes and then came back in the end.  If you are someone who has experiences with entities or knows someone who does, then you would know how ignorant this criticism is.  I believe the reason one ceases to "see" the ghosts is because they have become such a routine part of the character's life that they no longer shock the senses.  You don't see the ghosts but you continue to see the altar offering food throughout the series.  This is an indication that the writing staff di...

  The Egyptians went all out when a rich or important person died. Jars carved from alabaster, precious stones and gold laid throughout their tombs.  But what I find the most beautiful and troubling are the death masks.  They are sometimes the most ornate and finely crafted part of the burial outfit.  Literally, they are priceless which is why they were often stolen. Figuratively, they are the most destructive elements of the ritual of seeing one off to the land of the dead.  The eulogy is a must for a funeral. You have to find people that had positive experiences with the deceased to send them on to glory.  One shouldn't speak ill of the dead. Their secrets get buried with them. That is, until it becomes profitable to dig them up. The death mask is the most deceptive kind of mask. Some of the last words heard by relatives and loved ones about a person tend to linger in their hearts and minds.  Its improper to talk about how they sinned while alive. Wh...

  I may be bringing up something you already know about. Something that you acknowledged and accepted and tucked into a corner of your mind. After you wrote it off your taxes. I apologize. How rude of me. I'm still learning the rules. A late bloomer on the spectrum. I just found out that once something has been televised, cried over, legislated, joked about, talked about and there is more than one documentary... It's over.  Like a season that bears the same name but is always born anew.  I keep screaming winter.  I must have Tourette's too.

 1. We are one of the fattest nations on earth.  2. Grocery prices are high. I watch quite a few documentaries. I was watching one last month that focused on a small town in North Carolina.  A charity organization was providing 1 free meal a day to neighborhoods to offset the loss of the free meal because children of school age were home for the summer.  There were quite a few interviews of families. After a while, I noticed a pattern that was disturbing.  The first family I noticed this with was a married couple with 3 children. The father was telling the interviewer about how he manages on just one meal a day. His wife nodded in the background holding their infant.  At first I felt my hearth strings pull. But then after a few seconds I noticed that something was partially blocking the face of the baby and it was not a censor block or blur.  It was this man's belly. I then noticed the belly out in front of the baby's mother (who was not pregnant)....

 Being unbothered, minding your business, and paying dust to petty ass hoes is a recipe for unwanted attention. You can be out here just living your life and some random cave ogre will talk to you or about you crazy.  Some of the stoics say you should just ignore them, that they are projecting their own misery on to you.  Not everyone values direct honest behavior. It is considered rude and unrefined.  In a world where the wealthy rest atop a pile of fortune labored into existence by the poor and middle class, stock in genuine intentions is in the negative.  I say that whenever possible you should give these passive aggressive little bitty biches a lesson in the value of integrity and empathy.  The real motivation of passive aggressive behavior isn't an outside source of anxiety, IMO. It DOES have to do with you specifically.  To go out of one's own way to plan and plot to "throw shade" at someone is not effortless.  This leads me to believe that ...

 I'm no political analyst, but I've been reading and understanding shit for a few decades now.  The Israeli/Hamas War or whatever they are calling it is getting out of hand.  I'm not just talking about the bombing deaths and economic abuse. The whole "feed the children" movement is getting ridiculous.  If I hear one more person refer to the starving children in Gaza I am going to lose it.  None of the following is going to solve this problem: 1. Drinking Natty lite while making smores and camping out on the "Quad." 2. Making cheesy T-shirts and hats. 3. Using the "what about the starving children in Gaza" bait and switch to avoid difficult political questions. 4. Protesting at college campuses (even if the professors are in on it) when you don't even fucking go there.  5. Interrupting my trash you tube podcasts with commercials that pull at your heart strings but provide no solution or plan.  6. Just saying it instead of spraying it.  None ...

  It seems like a new social media platform is born everyday. There are always new opportunities and ways to connect, network and share ideas.  That is the intention of these platforms, right? I mean who would create an entire digital world for the expressed purpose of tracking and monitoring the thoughts, dreams, desires and interests of a people? My first social media account was Facebook (My second was Black Planet don't judge me). I joined when Facebook was supposedly only for college students to connect, plan, and share.  That quickly changed and for the better.  Over the years I have watched social media being born and die. I saw the slow and painful death of Myspace and Black Planet. Most recently, I have witnessed the swift beheading of Twitter.  At least Lord Dorsey was amply compensated.  But the changes I see the most is how the platforms are used.  Yes, we are supposed to connect to one another using the internet.  That is the whole po...

 They said it was a myth. That it didn't exist.  Some even said it was racist.  Until it was there and taking down the real racists.  Black Twitter.  They had to kill a whole platform brand name to kill Black Twitter.  But little did they know that something else was brewing in the shadows. In a forgotten world. A world without commercials or advertisements (at first). A world that used to only exist on the outskirts of the internet on dusty forums where bandwidth was aplenty. They thought it was over...but...they should have known better... Black Youtube has since cured depression, cleared sinuses and gathered bitches together.  Fuck Tom Brady's roast. That shit was a dun dunnuh.  Some of the best roasts I have ever attended were on Black Youtube at 3am and NO ONE knew it was about to go down.  I won't say any names. I won't give away the key to the city. If you don't know how to get to Black Youtube then you don't belong there. 

  Guess how many teachers have been caught in the last month having inappropriate relationships with their students. Go ahead, guess.... You're wrong. I'm wrong. We're all wrong.  The truth is that we don't know. Statistics can't illuminate the truth.  And who's counting anyway. Its not like anyone actually gives a fuck about the sexual innocence of children.  But that is not what I'm here to be ignorant about.  I'm trying figure out why young,  attractive, employed and socially and financially stable WOMEN are going dick shopping in the children's section.  And if you are going to fuck a 12 year old... Why are you texting them and sending them pictures?  You are teaching math, english, science, social studies and whatever the else they are teaching middle school kids these days.  But you can't figure out that it is a bad idea to send nudes to a kid whose mom pays his phone bill? This little twit still goes underwear shopping with his mom. He...

  You heard me.  I watch too much Youtube. I get that.  While I understand that most of the content is blown out of proportion, some of the footage and interviews are primary sources of the bullshit that is churning from the mass migration of immigrants coming from South America and beyond. At first, I gave no fucks.  And then one night I was making "Salisbury Steak" out of ground turkey and my virgin ears happen to hear the news mentioning cutting funding to public park clean up in NYC.  Immediately my mind went to an apocalyptic horror scene of T-rex sized rats putting MORE cracks in the sidewalks and kicking un-monitored children out of the way to get to a discarded bag of popcorn.  (I stopped smoking weed years ago, so hush) What on Central Park's blood stained sidewalks could possibly catalyze such a dumb ass choice in funding?  And then I heard that man say: "This city cannot continue to house the immigrants with our current budget." OHHHH...the ...

  alright, lets just get this one out of the way... KIDS (infants, toddlers, elementary school age) are FUCKING DISGUSTING! They eat boogers, poop, dirt, glue...They'll even eat out of the damn dog's bowl if you let them.  So tell me why some celebrity parents are fighting tooth and nail to have the right to face invade their children's faces in public. I saw a you tube video the other day where a young mother took a half dissolved piece of pez candy from her toddler equipped with a rope of saliva still attached to the little demon's mouth.  AND SHE PUT IT IN HER MOUTH, YALL! SHE ATE IT,  YALL! OH MY GODDDDDDDDDDUHHH! I'm not going to name any  names but I will give you an explanation why I think mouth feeding and transference of food substances from the parents oral cavity to that of the child and vice versa is not a good idea.  GERMS YALL...GERMS! Didn't we just go through a pandemic? At one point they had set up a hotline to trace the spread of the virus...

 Ratchet. Loud. Violent. Ignorant. Rude. THOT. Gold digger... The list goes on. These are words used often to describe black women.  But there is one name you can't call us... Mass Shooter.  How is it that the most disrespected, openly ridiculed and shamed women on the planet aren't the ones running around putting bullets in the asses of grocery shoppers, concert goers and children at school? How is it that the most privileged, highest paid, most respected and revered members of society (white men) are the most likely to shoot innocent people in large numbers? Why isn't that ratchet hood rat doing it?  Some would say is because the black woman has been conditioned to be peaceful and made docile by white supremacy.  I don't know about that. The statistics don't match.  Black women are the ones leading the protests. More and more black women are dying in police custody for standing up for themselves. They are fast becoming the most educated socioeconomic grou...

  I'm not a huge Candace Owens fan. To be honest, I barely know who she is. She only seems to get brought to my attention when she says something someone with a large platform doesn't like. I'm not sure what she said and I'm not going to dig for it right now.  What really caught my interest is another knife in the back of civil rights and justice.  Every time something happens to a member of the Jewish community as a whole, there is a general consensus that nothing but sympathy or empathy should be felt and nothing given but support.  The obvious bias remains the elephant in the room. That elephant shouldn't be ignored.  There is a DOCUMENTED history of the torture, harassment, and terrorization of people of color.  I'm not just referring to the decades of lynching, bombings, and arson.  There is also the propaganda and scholarly contributions to various sciences to consider. This version of "DEATH CON 3" is a historical fact and an ongoing string of w...

  I have learned to embrace the fact that I am aging. In a population where apparently 1/3 of Americans will have some sort of cancer in their lifetime, I consider myself lucky. I am approaching 40. I am healthy.  But I'm noticing that quite a few people that I have encountered in my life that thought that "grimey" was the way to be are now humbled by their own flesh but not as much as they were driven by it.  Now that they are physically incapable of bullying and taking advantage of others, they want to preach about what matters in life and perseverance.  I wonder if they ever think about the people they put through hell on their journey to cancer town.  Do they wonder what realizations their victims had to come to in order to persevere? Cancer truly does not discriminate. It attacks the kind, the unfortunate, the brave, and the cowardly.  I do, as most people, discriminate when it comes to whom I express empathy for.  I do not feel sorry for people w...

 Whenever a long awaited movie comes out the critics and analysts are at the ready. Sometimes they are so eager to make a mark with their keen observations that they miss nuances in the story that enhance the plot.  Here are some answers that I have come up with to some of the questions regarding consistency and plot. Tracker: Mr. Nobody -Some seem to think that "Mr. Nobody" is a conundrum. A mystery that has no explanation. Almost as if he was inserted into the story at the last minute.  He is indeed strange. He seems committed to an unknown and unstated objective. He wants to drive up the bounty on Wick's head.  But to what end?  Anyway, a question came up in the forums about his control over his "support animal." The dog always seems to make the right decision to forward the plot even when his master is entrapped in dramatic irony. How can this be? Why did the dog not attack Caine instead of the man behind him? The answer here is quite simple. The dog does no...

  It's fun, it's funny and its timeline is damn near impossible to decipher.  I can't tell if the movie is weeks long, days long or involves time travel.  I would argue that technically it does involve time travel since the lead character crosses time zones several times.  I cannot organize my mind right now to completely dissect this movie but I will pull out my favorites: Favorite Color: RED -Red themes throughout this movie set the tone and are artistically manipulated to help tell the story.  Favorite Food: Them apples .  -This movie was serving apple pie, fritters, croissants and sake for that ass.  Favorite Landmark: Arc de Triomphe -NO SPOILERS: Don't believe me? Just watch.  Favorite Random Object: Umbrella - Because homeless folks must stick together.  Favorite Quote: "We're in this together now, John." Favorite Animal: Pidgeon -They are everywhere, chilling, always got the best seats in the house. I'm so jelly.  Favorite Song: ...

 Oh Mr. Ye what will you do next? Apparently the new rumor running about regarding Kanye's marriage to Bianca is that she doesn't have free will. A reporter approached Kanye and his wife with her phone recording to ask him about this rumor. He promptly snatches the phone from her hand like an accomplished kung fu student taking the pebble from master's hand.  The assumption that Biana Censori who is an educated, independently wealthy woman of Italian organized crime heritage is somehow subservient to Kanye West is laughable.  This is the same man who had his billionaire crown snatched off him for insulting the Jewish community. This is the same man that has been called crazy and openly stalked for years.  Yes, because the only reason why a young beautiful successful woman would be with one the most prolific and influential hip hop artists of this era is because she is being controlled.  I would have snatched that bitch's phone too.  Back to the stalking... ...

  Him: "Would you be homeless with me?" Me: "Is it the Apocalypse?" I get it what he was trying to say and I respect his right to say it but that doesn't mean I should let him get away with saying that shit.  Men like to test women as if they are the ones that hold the keys to society. For some reason, this man in particular seem to have gotten it in his mind that I was a gold digger. I think the cognitive dissonance associated with a severe personality disorder is to blame.  In general, I find that women of color have to prove their love to men. Even if they are paying for everything. Even if they are doing all the work. Even if they show up wearing a cape to help save the day, they still have to prove themselves.  So when he asked me if I would be homeless with him, my first instinct wasn't to retaliate against years of philosophical gaslighting that women of color experience. Honestly, there wasn't enough time to even get to that place.  My first inst...

 Its in their brain. The misogynistic male is such because his neurons are wrapped in entitlement.  And women are to blame.  As women (yes, I am including myself) we cannot continue to reward certain behaviors and ignore other behaviors and somehow magically expect chivalrous men to pop out the ground.  We are sowing seeds of laziness and complacency.  I understand that we are not all the same. We all want different things and have different goals and needs.  But I don't think that any of us want to live in a world where men believe that women are to be sexually abused and silent.  I also don't think most women want to live in a world where their success, independence and assertiveness are declarations of war.  I grew up in the south where the refined young woman was taught to secure a marriage young. You are always to be pretty and submissive. You are to marry above your station (and older than you). You have children and give a man no reason to ...